Foreign Country?

Well I suppose I should post again. I'm really having a hard time pin-pointing how I feel about this whole experience thus far. I really don't feel anything. I will say this. This trip is so far NOTHING like I thought it would be.

I'm living in a house probably worth close to as much as my house in Flower Mound. I have wireless internet and a phone. I have a Mexican cell phone to use. There's nothing weird or different about the toilets or showers (except of course, for the extremely low pressure). There's a Wal-Mart, a Sonic, a Dairy Queen, a Burger King, a Carl's Jr., and of course a McDonald's. Everyone here drives cars. And nice ones too. There's no dust, no dirt, no desert (at least not in Chihuahua), just neat, clean city. There's a huge mall. A huge FloMo-esque gated community. You can walk down the street alone at night without fear. I'm sleeping in a bed bigger than the one I have at my parents' house. I eat close to 5 full meals a day, all different and tasty (no beans and rice for me). I'm actually dressing up kind of each day (I've only worn a t-shirt once--strange). I get up and shower AND straighten my hair almost every morning. I go DAYS without showering in the states. And Lord knows I never straighten my hair. I go to bed before midnight every night. I hang out with 2 women (almost 30 and 30) in my spare time and mainly talk about their marriages and their young kids. There are even nice restaurants. In fact, I've yet to go to a crappy one (as far as looks go...well for that matter...food quality too). Everyone drinks purified water and there's virtually no risk of drinking the bad stuff.

Other than crazy driving, road-side Mexico paraphernalia vendors and Tarahumara indians in the streets at big intersections during the day, this place is just like any other American city. It's really throwing me off. Apparently (according to a local), Chihuahua really is the most "American" city in Mexico. I won't lie. I'm slightly disappointed. I hoped for a real foreign experience. Nothing really feels foreign here. Except for the lax sense of time and commitment and the lack of fruit snacks and cracker packs in all grocery stores (including Wal-Mart).

What were my expectations, you ask? Granted, I went into this thinking I had none (I wrote in my journal the day I flew out here, "I honestly just have no idea what to expect..."). But I've come to find that I definitely had expectations. And lots of them. I expected fewer cars, or at least crappier ones, and no air conditioning. I imagined dry heat, and dust. I imagined loud city buses as being the most common way to get around. I imagined a small, modest, traditionally Mexican house I'd be living in with no nice tile floors and definitely no wireless internet. I imagined a quiet, cozy environment to rest and do my homework in. I imagined having time to read in the evenings. I imagined no TV in the house (although we never watch it...), and rustic showers and toilets. I imagined rice and beans and tortillas, not Honey Bunches of Oats, Lucky Charms, and chicken salads. I imagined things spaced out more, with dirt roads, not all brick and mortar, asphalt and cement. I imagined open air markets for food and for clothing and other goods. Not mile after mile of different grocery stores, department stores, and familiar fast food joints. I imagined meeting people my age from a church right away, and hanging out with them, having girls' nights with them. (No offense Jenny Beth, I'm so blessed to have ya'll!) I imagined having seen more of the city by now; I imagined getting more of a feel for Mexican culture by now.

That's not my Mexico. This feels American. I really don't feel like I'm studying in a different country. I don't feel like there's really anything to be jealous of. There's nothing different and cool about this. Yet. I'm bankin' on the yet.